happy to noe that i have 4 more days left of my leave. yessa!
mite be taking 1 day off da day afta hari raya haji. and da rest i culd make use of it end of da year or most probably next yr. jan 4th and 5th. i guess. damn im turning 25 real fast.

oh yea. suddenly having the tot to stay low profile kinda works afta all. afta being told da truth. words does hurt. stabbed me hard. with da headache i had since yesterday, thanks to the remarks i got, it just worsen the ache. i culd somehow feel my blood gushin up to my pee brain. fuck. but i did gd somehow. i wasnt being harsh nor rude. just kept quiet til i reach my door step. best remedy is to be silent? well it does work for me.

for wad i know now. i don exist. from the very 1st place and i believe i will neva be. therefore. no point making my existence known. to me they are the same person. bt da fact is, i failed to see that they are completely different. how stupid can i be, not to see the real thing. well i guess.i got them mix up. a person with a split personality. i should hav known better that i fall for the other one. not him.

its pretty much clearer now that i am da stupid fool. starting frm today. i noe who i am. and where i should be and should do/dont do. period!

i slept over da matter and waking up still feelin hurt. i dreamt of being very angry and my head is still in pain. well partly becoz im not feelin well. :(

well wadeva it is. i wuld like to thank him for making me feel existed in some ways. i shall continue being in love wid him and not u. coz im beginning not to know u animore. though my eyes see one, but the truth is. there are two.

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